Want to know the best Joel Hirschhorn movies? How about the worst Joel Hirschhorn movies? Curious about Joel Hirschhorn box office grosses or which Joel Hirschhorn movie picked up the most Oscar® nominations? Need to know which Joel Hirschhorn movie got the best reviews from critics and audiences and which got the worst reviews? Well you have come to the right place….because we have all of that information.
Joel Hirschhorn (1937-2005) was a two-time Oscar® winning American singer, composer and writer. Hirschhorn’s songs sold more than 90 million records. Various artists including Elvis Presley, recorded his songs…and Hollywood is still using his work in current movies. His IMDb page shows over 80 credits from 1966-2017. This page will rank Joel Hirschhorn movies from Best to Worst in six different sortable columns of information.
Drivel Part 1: Why a Joel Hirschhorn UMR page? Well….his book….Rating the Movie Stars…is one of the most influential books on this website. Published in 1983, it is a book I have been referencing for almost 40 years. In that book, Hirschhorn, rated every movie that a movie star appeared in during their career. Sometime in 2010, for the millionth time I was looking at his book when I wondered; had he updated his ratings lately? A quick internet check provided the sad news that Mr. Hirchhorn had passed away in 2005. About a month later, I thought I could update the ratings….tunrs out those were the first baby steps of UMR.
Drivel Part 2: This page is from a request from Bob. Bob has been requesting a Joel Hirschhorn page for almost 2 years now. Constantly filling up our request page…with Hirschhorn requests….day after day. Well Bob….finally your Hirsch page is here….hope it was worth the wait…lol.
Joel Hirschhorn Movies Ranked In Chronological Order With Ultimate Movie Rankings Score (1 to 5 UMR Tickets) *Best combo of box office, reviews and awards.
Joel Hirschhorn Movies Can Be Ranked 6 Ways In This Table
The really cool thing about this table is that it is “user-sortable”. Rank the movies anyway you want.
- Sort Joel Hirschhorn movies by co-stars of his movies.
- Sort Joel Hirschhorn movies by adjusted domestic box office grosses using current movie ticket cost (in millions)
- Sort Joel Hirschhorn movies by yearly domestic box office rank
- Sort Joel Hirschhorn movies how they were received by critics and audiences. 60% rating or higher should indicate a good movie.
- Sort by how many Oscar® nominations each Joel Hirschhorn movie received and how many Oscar® wins each Joel Hirschhorn movie won.
- Sort Joel Hirschhorn movies by Ultimate Movie Rankings (UMR) Score. UMR Score puts box office, reviews and awards into a mathematical equation and gives each movie a score.
Stats and Possibly Interesting Things From The Above Joel Hirschhorn Table
- Five Joel Hirschhorn movies crossed the magical $100 million domestic gross mark. That is a percentage of 22.72% of his movies listed. The Towering Inferno (1974) was his biggest box office hit when looking at adjusted domestic box office gross.
- An average Joel Hirschhorn movie grosses $91.20 million in adjusted box office gross.
- Using RottenTomatoes.com’s 60% fresh meter. 14 Joel Hirschhorn movies are rated as good movies…or 46.80% of his movies. The Ice Storm (1997) is his highest rated movie while The Fat Spy (1969) was his lowest rated movie.
- Three Joel Hirschhorn movies received at least one Oscar® nomination in any category…..or 13.63% of his movies.
- Two Joel Hirschhorn movies won at least one Oscar® in any category…..or 9.09% of his movies.
- An average Ultimate Movie Rankings (UMR) Score is 40.00. 8 Joel Hirschhorn movies scored higher than that average….or 36.36% of his movies. The Towering Inferno (1974) got the the highest UMR Score while The Fat Spy (1969) got the lowest UMR Score.
Possibly Interesting Facts About Joel Hirschhorn
1. Joel Hirschhorn was born in Bronx, New York in 1937.
2. After graduating from Manhattan’s High School of Performing Arts, he became a regular performer on New York’s nightclub circuit, both as a solo singer and as a member of the rock & roll band, The Highlighters.
3. During the mid-1960s, Hirschhorn branched out into writing film soundtracks. The results were horrible. 1969’s The Fat Spy is considered to be one of the worst movies ever made.
4. Joel Hirschhorn’s The Fat Spy (1969) is the 11th worst movie in our UMR 36,000 plus movie database.
5. Joel Hirschhorn worked with songwriting partner Al Kasha from the 1960s until the late 1990s.
6. Joel Hirschhorn (and Al Kasha) were nominated for four Oscars® and four Golden Globes®. They won Oscars® for 1972’s The Poseidon Adventure and 1974’s The Towering Inferno. They received two Oscar® nominations for 1977’s Pete’s Dragon.
7. Joel Hirschhorn and Al Kasha also worked together on Broadway musicals, receiving Tony Award® for Best Original Score nominations for both Copperfield and Seven Brides for Seven Brothers.
8. Joel Hirschhorn the book author. Besides his book RatingThe Movie Stars, Hirschhorn also wrote 2001’s The Complete Idiot’s Guide to Songwriting.
9. *Joel Hirschhorn’s Bette Davis story: “Star quality is difficult to define, but my personal definition was formed after a lunch with Bette Davis. At the time (1972), Davis was to appear in the musical “Copperfield,” which I had co-written with Al Kasha. Al and I went to the Bel Air Hotel to play the score for her. She was a petite, almost delicated woman, but there was nothing timid about her direct gaze, and authoritative speaking voice. We need a piano and the empty dining room didn’t have one, so she told a work-man, “We must have a piano immediately.” She wasn’t rude, but her firmness brooked no argument. The piano materialized in seconds. She applauded after we performed the songs, and I modestly ventured that “We had a lot of help from Dickens.” She responded, “Yes, but look what you did with him!” Her conviction made me feel we were on par with Dickens, that he was lucky to have us as collaborators! She had wit, intelligence, force, charm, vulerability – but most of all, a highly charge belief in herself, in her ability to dominate. The performer who has this belief and this assured, takeover quality can make film vehicles timeless.”
10. Check out Joel Hirschhorn’s career compared to current and classic actors. Most 100 Million Dollar Movies of All-Time
Academy Award® and Oscar® are the registered trademarks of the Academy of Motion Arts and Sciences.
*Bette Davis story comes from Hirschhorn’s Rating The Movie Stars book.
Joel shows up at about 45 seconds.
In a way though it’s all now historically academic. Whatever Hollywood-style power struggles went on between the younger Sinatra and Brando in those long-ago days when both were fast-progressing upwardly-mobile; whatever the relevance of what Hirsch thought of his ‘mumbling’ whipping-boy; BOTH Sinatra and Brando ended up in Variety’s Top 10 greatest entertainers of the 20th Century.
And the same pair were included in only 4 mainstream Hollywood stars [the other two being MM and Chaplin] to be included in Time magazine’s 100 most influential people of the 20th century from all professions and walks of life: for example the great Franklin Delano Roosevelt; Albert Einstein; The Kennedys as a family; Mother Teresa; Princess Diana; Rosa Parks the civil rights activist.
What company to be in! And there being “only so many hands in a deck of cards” nearly every one of those thespians whom Hirsch drooled and fawned over unfortunately didn’t make the cut although Joel’s ‘pets’ were mostly people whom EVERYONE has always oohed and ahhed about over the years whereas as one historian put it, despite his great influence and reputation of Joel’s punchbag “Brando was never FASHIONABLE” with the “in-crowd” – so we gotta hand it to him: ole Joely played it safe. As the saying goes though “All’s well that ends well.”
Film historians often bring up that Bogie never precisely said “Play it Again Sam” and that Cagney whilst he may have used approximations didn’t actually coin the phrase “You dirty rat!”
On page 57 of his 1983 book Rating the Movie Stars Joel Hirschhorn alleges that when working with Brando on Guys and Dolls Sinatra “derisorily” referred to Marlon as “mumbles”.
It could be that Hirsch was simply lazily buying into a woolly legend that has long prevailed; Joel for his own no doubt good reasons showing a willingness to throw the kitchen sink at Brando to minimize the latter’s achievements.
Be that as it may I have just read an account of the Guys and Dolls Brando/Sinatra relationship from one of Frankie’s own biographers and he tells it a bit differently from Joel-
“Frank was sore with Marlon for not just getting the Terry Malloy part that Sinatra had coveted in On the Waterfront but for also landing the Sky Masterson lead in Guys and Dolls and leaving Frank with the secondary role of Nathan Detroit. Frank complained ‘Marlon [not being a song and dance man] wasn’t suitable for that part [originally meant for Gene Kelly] BUT to be fair to the guy he recognized that himself.’”
Also in later life Sinatra told his biographer. “Although I have gotta lot of good reviews for my SERIOUS acting, when preparing for a non-musical dramatic part I am often in a quandary about how best to approach such roles technically. Sometimes I crack it from my own devices but on other occasions I borrow a leaf from Marlon Brando’s book.”
“I’ve got a Horse right here;
His name is Paul Revere.
And here’s a guy that says if the weather’s clear
can do, can do, this guy says the Horse can do.
Why it’s good old reliable Nathan!
Nathan, Nathan, Nathan, Detroit
“Drivel Part 2: This page is from a request from Bob. Bob has been requesting a Joel Hirschhorn page for almost 2 years now. Constantly filling up our request page…with Hirschhorn requests….day after day. Well Bob….finally your Hirsch page is here….hope it was worth the wait…lol.”
HI BOB COX
The foregoing quote is an extract from Bruce’s lead-in at the top of this page.
Bob you are one of the most friendly and thoughtful regulars whom I have had the pleasure of encountering since joining this site.
I have therefore been meaning for some time to ask you why you persuaded Bruce to impose upon us someone like that Hirschhorn character and thus dent the 100% feelgood factor that we normally experience when we look in on the site?
I would have raised the issue before this but as you have probably worked out for yourself I tend to shy away from writing about Joel Hirschhorn.
Anyway please take extra care of yourself in the present circumstances.
love that Bob. happy April 30th, which in the U.S.A. is national honesty day in sharp contrast to April first , April fools day.
I did not persuade Bruce to do a Joel page as much as he was brainwashed by 35 years of exposure to a certain book that should have a warning label lest others let it into their homes and minds. thankfully Bruce recognized this influence and decided to fix it (he says “update”, how kind).
this page is just evidence of what constant Bob-bardment can accomplish.
let the feelgood continue, Yea UMR, Yea Bruce, Yea Bob, Yea joel the inspiration for UMR.
bob cox
April 30, 2020 at 10:33 pm
“I did not persuade Bruce to do a Joel page as much as he was brainwashed by 35 years of exposure to a certain book that should have a warning label lest others let it into their homes and minds.”
Well spoken Bob Cox. This is one of the most accurate descriptions of Joel’s book that I have yet read and I’m surprised that the editorial staff of this site have let it run. As it is it seems that other viewers are beginning to form an opinion that I have long held; but at least they have been warned that an L Ron Hubbard figure has been thrust into their mist.
As always nice hearing from you Bob
Steve Lensman
April 3, 2020 at 4:19 pm
I’ve been reading Woody Allen’s autobiography, the one that just came out. I’m not actually a fan and I’ve only seen a handful of his films but I was very interested in his story, especially about certain events.
Anyway turns out his favorite film is… wait for it… A Streetcar Named Desire.
Here’s an excerpt from the book ‘Apropos of Nothing’ –
“I grew up idolizing Tennessee Williams. Abe Burrows asked me when I was eighteen if there was anyone I wanted to meet to discuss my interest in writing with. I said Tennessee Williams. He said Tennessee’s not the kind of guy whom one can easily sit and chat with. I read all his plays, all his books. I have my favorite plays and productions.
As I gushed earlier, the movie of Streetcar is for me total artistic perfection. With the exception of the bullsh*t end moment, bowing to what D. H. Lawrence called “the censor-moron.” It’s the most perfect confluence of script, performance, and direction I’ve ever seen. I agree with Richard Schickel, who calls the play perfect.
The characters are so perfectly written, every nuance, every instinct, every line of dialogue is the best choice of all those available in the known universe. All the performances are sensational. Vivien Leigh is incomparable, more real and vivid than real people I know. And Marlon Brando was a living poem. He was an actor who came on the scene and changed the history of acting.
The magic, the setting, New Orleans, the French Quarter, the rainy humid afternoons, the poker night. Artistic genius, no holds barred.”
In terms of stardom Brodie had two biggies in All the King’s men and Born Yesterday and then mysteriously largely settled for supporting roles or/and unimportant parts. Despite Brodie and Golden Holden being in Born Yesterday I couldn’t stand Judy Holliday’s dumb blonde act so I have never seen that movie. [Nice little miniature above however. You know how I adore good stills]
I did like All the King’s Men though and other movies in which I have enjoyed Brodie regardless of the quality of the parts are Not as a Stranger/Fastest Gun Alive/Lone Star/Sin Town/New York Confidential/The Decks Ran Red/Stop Your Killing me [a remake of Edward G’s 1938 A Slight Case of Murder]/and Cargo to Capetown a 1950 film that reunited Brodie with his Kings Men pal John Ireland but which I don’t see listed above.
Down the years my brother who lives in Australia has fondly kept quoting Brodie from 1956’s The Fastest Gun Alive. In that one Crawford’s bad-hat Vinnie Harold has a compulsion to prove himself the fastest man with a gun that is almost a strong as is your addiction to quoting Joel to us.
My brother has never forgotten the scene near the end where Vinnie is waiting for Charlie Bill Stuart to emerge from the church and draw against him and Vinnie is beside himself with impatience to confirm he is faster than Charlie Bill’s George Temple. As he waits Vinnie with his hands hovering and twitching above his guns keeps muttering “I gotta know! I gotta know!”
Anyhow I am really pleased with this new page and will end as I began with well done Work Horse. Keep safe and remember one of the primary scholarly rules for good writing – “look after the commas and the rest will look after itself!”